Struggling with my bio

A few days ago I received a link via e-mail to a website that had been set up for my upcoming 10 year high school reunion. Although I have no desire whatsoever to GO to my reunion, I was excited about the feature on the website that let people update everyone on what was going on in their life. I've become slightly addicted to it; logging in freuqently with hopes that all of the sudden there will be a list of all my former classmates so that I can find out what they are doing with their lives. So far there is *maybe* 10. Out of about 135.

And then comes the struggling with what to write about me. For some reason my life doesn't seem good enough. So I try to figure out if I can "spin" it a certain way to make things sound better. But why should it have to be better. I have a really great life. There really isn't anything else that I would ask for. Sure, I could ask for more money, a cleaning lady, a nanny, etc, but overall I think I'm a pretty lucky girl.

This whole thing has me puzzled. If I don't care to go to my reunion because there isn't anyone that I really care about from my class that I don't see on a fairly regular basis, then why do I care what they think of me? Why do I feel like being a stay at home mom isn't good enough? It makes me feel like other people are going to think of me a living in a white trash trailer park (no offense to Angie and Eric! ;) ), with my dirty kids running a muck, and my beer-bellied, chain smoking, grease-under-the-fingernails husband yelling "woman, git me a beer!" at me. But when I think of stay at home moms, especially the ones that I personally know, that's not the case at all.

I'm so messed up.